Losing Spanish :(

In the name of Spanish, I write this post :(. I just opened up a Spanish novel, that I wanted to read, but feel totally intimidated. I'd much rather stare at a book that has some kanji in it. lol
I knew it was only a matter of time before it happened, but yes, I am losing my dear Spanish. I started learning Spanish when I was about 12 or so, and continued all the way until I graduated from college. But let's face it, no matter how good people said I was, or how better I was than the other students, I still sucked when it came to actually "real" Spanish. In high school, always going to Germany, I interacted with a lot of Hispanics in Germany, from Cuba, Puerto Rico, and so on. Then I took a 2 week trip to Costa Rica when I realized that I didn't understand as much as I wanted to, or couldn't speak very well. Then in university I went to Panama, possibly a future home :) There, I really felt like man, after all this Spanish class, my Spanish still sucks...lol
Don't get me wrong I still love Spanish, but it is low on the priority list. When I get to a nice level, in Japanese I'll go back and "re-learn" Spanish. I still listen to music in Spanish n stuff, but am not really taking it in. I feel way more confident in my Japanese as far as understanding and being able to speak. But I guess it's because it was a different, clearly better learning process from the beginning.
Well in the name of Spanish, I post this video. Maybe I'll peek in my novel once more again. These are quotes from my one of my favourite authors, Gabriel Garcia Marquez.